Sunday, July 16, 2006

My Hair, My Heartbreak

I am having a big hair day, yes it's true, this freaking heat and humidity have turn my usually very well behaved and cute hair into a kinda frizzy mess that won't do anything. Hence the big, bad hair day. It's amazing with all the different products I have that I can't find one that will make my hair at least semi cute.

I took a shower before work today like usual and as usual, I grabbed my BedHead Roughed Up and squeezed the recommended amount plus a little into my hand. As I was running it through my hair, I use that to give it a bit of texture and that, um, roughed up look. I then applied a bit of Got2BinControl that usually makes it all stay in place and finally I added just a little bit of BedHead Shine because I don't like the over product look with overtly stiff hair so that tends to not make it too stiff and all nice and shiny. So, depending on how long my hair is or the look I'm going for the product changes but that's the standard gotta get to work on time routine. My hair was looking ok in the bathroom but then I walked out into the livingroom and I swear within 10 minutes it was all kinda poofy and frizzy. Ok I have this thing about my hair being frizzy even a little bit. So after looking at my poor hair in horror in the mirror for a minute or two I checked the time and decide I had enough time to wash it out and start over. This time I broke out the big guns: the Got2B Glued, BedHead Rewind and to keep it from frizzing, Got2BDefiant. Convinced that there was no way it was gonna frizz or even move much for the rest of the day I headed off to work in a self induced delusion of having a good hair day.


I was halfway to work when I got my first inkling that maybe all was not as well as I had hoped with my hair. It was hot, really hot and I was a little sweaty considering the Stealth has no AC. Ok wait I don't think girls sweat, I think we glisten, so I was really glistening, not unlike one of Madonna's back up dancers after 5 songs. I went to wipe my forehead to get rid of a bit of the glistening that was threatening to drip into my eye because I have had that experience before and let me tell you, it's not fun while driving. It stings with all that product mixed with the salty goodness of um, glistening(?). It's worse than that pepper spray I got in the eyes that one time I thought it would be funny to hide in my cousins house until he got home one night and scare the fuck out of him, yeah that didn't turn out so well. But I digress. Just know that having that much product mixed with sweat and getting it in your eye while driving is the equivalent to trying to drive while you have a rabid squirrel trying to gouge out your eyes. At least that's how it feels.

Anywho, I glanced up at the rearview mirror and noticed that my hair was starting to look a little limp in the front and a little frizzy on the sides. OK, not to panic, I can fix it up with a little bit of water when I get to work I naively told myself. I got to work 15 minutes early and said a quick hello as I made a beeline for the bathroom before anyone could see the state that my hair was in. By this point the front had gone limp like overcooked angelhair pasta noodles and the sides looked like Bozo's hairstylist had gotten to them. I ran a bit of water through it right quick but it was too much water so now instead of the usual Bedhead messy look I sported, I looked like a drowned rat. Ok, ok, dont' panic, I told myself, think quick, I ran my hands through it at least a few dozen times but it was no use, it refused to look anything even remotely cute. The sides wouldn't push forward, they laid there like a useless roommate on the couch. The top was no long being limp, oh no, it had decided to go all horribly frizzy like the kinda of frizz you see someone with after a really bad home perm went wrong. If I could have left right then and there, I would have but as great of a company as I work for they have yet to recognize a bad hair day as a reasonable option for calling in or going home. So I had to stay there and tough it out for the day. I knew I should have gotten a hair cut this weekend. Bad hair truly breaks my heart.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Where are the pictures??? I want to see glisteny product pictures LOL. you know, a blog is nothing without pictures.

Anonymous said...

Now you know why I shave my head. ;)

Seriously, I had a mullet once.
Ick.
I thought I looked like the bomb, but instead, I looked like crap.

Anonymous said...

Nice idea with this site its better than most of the rubbish I come across.
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